


Mixing business with pleasure

by deadp0et



Category: Chicago Fire
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-08-01
Updated: 2015-08-09
Packaged: 2018-04-12 05:36:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 18,536
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4467341
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deadp0et/pseuds/deadp0et
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Matt's point of view in this chapter is going to be short but I felt like I should put it in somewhere.</p></blockquote>





	1. Don't leave me

_Matt's P.O.V. . ._

 

_"Squad 3, truck 81, battalion 25, ambulance 61, house fire 1948 walbash."_

"Let's go." I got up and jogged out to truck 81, slipping on my boots, and fire gear. "Cruz, move it!" Cruz jumped into the driver's seat and the engines roared to life, and well as the lights and sirens. "1948 Walbash..haven't we been called there before?" 

Cruz nodded. "Yeah, a couple of months ago, I think."

"Lovely." We pulled up in front of the house and I put on my fire cap, jumping out of the truck. Kelly jumped out about the same time as I did. "Severide, take Vargas and Mills in to do search and rescue. Otis, Hermmann, you're with me. Mouch and Cruz, go to the roof and vent. We'll follow Severide. Double time, guys. It looks like the fire has already spread to the structure."

Chief Boden stopped us. "You guys have 5 minutes, tops. Make it count."

I followed Severide into the blistering fire. "Casey, take the second floor, we'll take the basement and first floor!"

I gave him a thumbs up. "Otis, Hermmann, let's go!" We went up the stairs, and I took the first bedroom. "Fire department, call out!" I went into the room to do a look over, no one was there. I walked into the next, and last bedroom as Herrmann and Otis to the two bathrooms. "Fie department, call ou-" I was cut off my falling two stories, and slamming on concrete. I felt the wind exert my body and I tried to breathe but I was struggling. My buzzer started going off and I flinched at the piercing noise.

"Lieutenant!" I heard Herrmann's voice through my radio, but I couldn't move to respond, everything was numb and I felt a shooting pain in my side. "We're coming to get you, Casey!" Herrmann yelled from where I had fallen. "Severide, it's casey. He fell to the basement."

"We're on our way." The words started fading and I saw someone in the corner of my eyes, but it all came in slow motion, their words sounded muffled, and I heard a loud ringing noise. I tried to get up, but that ultimately failed. I saw Kelly running down, and I think he said my name, I couldn't tell. I closed my eyes, then everything went black.  
When I came to, Severide was sitting next to me in the Ambulance as Dawson put an IV in me. I could see Kelly's worry, he wore is like a mask. "You stay with me, you hear?" He gripped onto my hand, and I tried to respond, but couldn't.

"BP 80 over 40, Shay, move your ass or we'll lose him!"

I tried to squeeze Severide's hand, and I guess it worked, because he started saying, "Dawson, he squeezed my hand..is that good or bad?"

She pulled out a flashlight, and shined it in my eyes. "He's responsive, that's a good thing but his internal bleed is getting worse." I felt the ambulance come to a stop, and the doors opened. Kelly jumped down and helped get me out. "His heart rate is low, he's responding, but he has an internal bleed an-"

The doctor interrupted Dawson. "We can take it from here." They took me back into a room and moved me to another bed. "Matt, can you hear me?" He shined a flashlight in my eyes, and I squinted slightly. "Alright, matt," The doctor paused as he put a mask over my face. "This is an anesthetic, you should be asleep within 3 minutes." I tried to nod. I became sleepy very quickly, and I slowly closed my eyes, letting everything fade.

 

_Severide's P.O.V. . ._

I looked around at all of firehouse 51, all of them patiently awaiting a doctor to update us. _Please be okay, Matt._ I put my head in my hands. _He has to pull through. He has to._ "Serveride, He'll be fine." Shay put her hand on my shoulder as if she had just read my mind. "Just breathe." I let out a breath I hadn't even realized I was holding in. "There you go." She pulled me into and awkward side hug, but it was over as soon as it had started, because the doctor came into the waiting room.

 I got up and walked over to the doctor, and he lead me down the hallway. I saw Dawson, and Herrmann step out to watch. "What's the word, Doc?"

"He's going to be okay..it was a touch and go surgery, he died 3 times in there..but we've got him stable for now, but the next day is going to be the hardest." My breath caught and I started crying, the doctor placed both hands on my shoulders to steady me.

"Thank you.." After I collected myself, I walked back down to the waiting room, and I paused for a moment, looking around from Shay, to Mouch, then Mills. "He's going to be okay-" I was cut off by everyone erupting into shouts of joy. "Guys, guys!" I whistled and they all stopped. "The doctor said the surgery was touch and go, and that he dies3 times on the table..he's stable for now, but the next 24 hours..Casey is still going to be fighting for his life." I saw everyone's facials expressions shift from Joy, to dejected. "But, they're hopeful. And Matt is a fighter," I saw Dawson wipe at a tear that had slipped. "You guys go home, get some rest. I'll stay here with him." They all collectively got up, and shuffled out of the room

Chief Boden stopped in front of me. "Take next shift off, stay with matt." He clapped me on the shoulder then walked out.

 After a couple of minutes it was just Dawson and I. "You gonna be okay?" I put my hand on her shoulder.

"Yeah..I think so," She paused and looked up at me, "if you don't watch it, the whole house is going to see the feelings you have for Casey."

"Shut it, Dawson." I playfully hit her on the shoulder and she gave a small smile. I pulled her into a brief hug, then let go. "Go home, Kiddo. You'll be he first to know if anything changes." She nodded and left the room. I sighed and slumped into a chair.  
It was exactly 3 hours later until another doctor came into the waiting room. "Kelly Severide?" I stood up. "You can go back to his room now." I nodded and followed the doctor back. "He'll be out for another couple of hours, but you are more them welcome to hang out in here..it's probably more comfortable than the waiting room." He smiled at me, then walked out.

I pulled up one of the chairs and sat next to him. "Hey, Casey." I reached for his hand, then stopped. _Come on, Severide. Don't be weird._ I felt a wave of sorrow wash over me. I let out a small chuckle. "Hah..look at me, getting all emotional." One tear slid down my cheek and I swiped at it. "You see what you do to me?" I looked over to his pale body. "You little bastard." I half smiled, then paused for a minute. "There's, uh..there's some things I feel like I should tell you.." I sucked in a breath, "and in light of what's happened today..almost losing you, I think these..things..need to spoken." I started biting at my lip. "And, of course I would never tell you this if you were actually awake. To be honest, I don't even know what to say or how to say it...you just, you mean, well..everything to me. Dawson can see it, so obviously I'm not doing the best job at hiding it. I'm scared to tell you because I don't know if you feel the same way, and rejection..scares the hell out of me, which is probably hard to believe with the amount of girls I hook up with," I paused for a moment, "but they're just..distractions. Ways for me to exert he feelings I have you for you, or suppress them, at least. And it isn't because I'm embarrassed, god, no. Because everyone in house accepts Shay. Hell, they love her. And I know if they knew about me, they wouldn't think differently. But the feelings I have for you..they mess with my judgment. Like today, for instance..Herrmann yelled over the radio that you had fallen to the basement, I was in the middle of saving a kid that was stuck in his room..and I wanted to drop everything to go and help you...and that's one of the first things they teach you when you're in the academy. You never put your house mates before the victims, ever. But, goddamn it..you do things to me. Things that I never even thought possible. You make me feel things I didn't even know I could feel..I'm..I'm in love with you, Matthew Casey..and at first, I was so angry because I didn't understand what was going on, I didn't blame you for Andy's death, I was angry because of my feelings towards you, I didn't even know that I had feelings for you, or..I just didn't want to admit it to myself. It's taken me a year and half to come to terms with it..the fact that I love you. And I know these feelings won't just go away, believe me, I've tried everything to push the down. Girls, drinking..at one point in time, I even started to avoid you in hopes that it would help. Surprise..it didn't. It just made me miss you..I look forward to going on shift because of you. And then we get calls, and when you disappear into a building, or house, when that fire is blazing..it scares the shit out of me. The car crashes are a relief because I can keep my eye on you, and make sure you're okay. But those fires..it's hard for me not to charge in after you. I've gotten a little bit better, but not much. You screw with my head..in a good way, of course. A very good way. But sometimes it's a curse.." I glanced over at Matt, admiring his perfectly chisled chin, and beautiful face for a couple of seconds, "anyways..that's what I need to tell you..and someday, I'll be able to tell you to your face.." _Hopefully.  
_ About 2 and a half hours later, Matt started stirring in his bed. "Matt..?"

His eyes slowly fluttered open and he smiled. "Hey." His voice was hoarse.

"Hey." I returned the smile.

He tried to move, then winced. "Ahhh."

I instinctively started to worry. "Woah..take it easy, Casey."

"It's just the stitches.." He gave me an odd look. "Calm down, Lieutenant."

"Sorry.."  _Nice one, Severide._

"So..uhm..what exactly happened back there?"

"You don't remember?"

He shook his head.

"Well..I was on the first floor doing search and rescue, and Herrmann started yelling over the radio, saying that you fell to the basement. I guess the fire must've been in the structure. You're lucky you survived."

He lifted up his night gown, revealing his abdomen, and stitches. "That's gonna leave a nasty scar."

I laughed. "You fall two stories, land on solid concrete, died 3 times, and you're worried about the scar...Only you, Matt. Only you."

He tried to laugh, but made  'sssss' noise. "Don't make me laugh, you bastard. It hurts too much."

"Okay, okay. I'm sorry." He started fiddling with his IV and I couldn't help but smile..He was like a child sometimes, it was so adorable.

"What are you looking at?"

"You."

He blushed.

I gasped. "Matthew Casey, are you blushing?"

He covered his face with the blanket. "Maybe...so what."

I moved so I could pull the covers down. "Don't hide it." We were inches away from one another's face, and I stared into his eyes, then cast my eyes down to his lips, then back up again.

"Am I..Interrupting something?" Dawson walked in.

 _Yes._ I pulled back. "No, Matt and I were just messing around." 

She gave me that 'I-know-you're-lying' look, and walked over to Casey, handing him some flowers. "These are from everyone at 51."

"Here, let me get those." I reached for the flowers and took them out of Gabriella's hands. "I'll set them on the table over here." I placed them on the table, then sat back down next to Casey. "I was gonna text you and tell you he was awake, but I'm assuming Hallie told you."

She nodded. "Yeah, she called about 30 minutes ago, but I have to go soon, Boden only gave me 45 minutes." She bent down and kissed Matt on the cheek. "Get better. See ya, Severide." She waved at me then walked out.

"How come Hallie hasn't come in to see me yet?" Matt looked disappointed.

"Maybe she still feels bad about the falling out you two had." I shrugged.

"Yeah.." He pasued, "maybe."

"Hey," I placed my hand under his chin and forced him to look at me. "You think you're up for something to eat? I ran to the grocery store while you were asleep and got some chips, and a sub sandwich.

He licked his lips.

_Fuck, that's hot._

"I'm starved, now that you mention it."

I grabbed my bag and pulled out the sandwich and sour cream & Onion chips, then handed them to him. "Eat up."

"You bought my favorite kind of chips," He looked over to me and smiled, "thanks."

"No problem, hey, I'll be right back, I need to make a phone call." I got up and clapped him lightly on his shin, then walked out into the hallway.

_Matt's P.O.V. . ._

 

I popped a chip into my mouth as I watched Severide leave the room. _Nice View.._ I smiled to myself and ate a couple more chips, then grabbed the sandwich and took small little nibbles at it. I guess I wasn't has hungry as I thought. Placing the sub and chips on the mini table next to me, I pulled myself up and tried to stand, but ended up falling onto the floor. "Damnit."

Kelly ran in. "Are you okay?" He knelt down next to me and helped me back onto the bed.

"Yeah, I'm fine."

"Are you sure?" He reached for my hospital gown. "Let me check your stitches." He lifted it up and I felt a cold hand on my side.

"You're hand is cold."

He took his hand away, then cupped them over his face to warm them. "Better?" His hand was back on my side. I nodded. "Good." He examined my stitches, then let my gown fall back down. "They look fine." He looked..upset. "Matt, next time you want get out of bed, call me and I'll help you. You could have seriously hurt yourself."

I covered myself up. "But..you were on the phone, I didn't want to bug you-"

"I don't care if I'm on the phone, you just call out for me, okay?"

I nodded. "I'm sorry..I didn't mean to upset you..."

He sighed. "You didn't upset me. It's just some stuff going on at work."

"What's going on?"

"Nuh uh," he put his finger up, "it's none of your concern right now. You need to focus on getting better, not on what's going on at the fire house."

I sighed. "Fine, whatever."

Before Kelly could respond, my doctor came in. "Hey, you're awake." He pulled up a chair and sat down opposite of where Severide was. "How are you feeling?"

I shrugged. "My stitches hurt, and I'm sore everywhere, but other then that, I'm okay."

He nodded. "All normal, of course. You sustained serious injuries in the fall, you'll most likely be fore for the next week, and the stitches will only hurt for a day or so, the pain will ebb," He grabbed his note pad and flipped through it, "it says here that you're a firefighter, correct?" I nodded. "Ahh, that would explain falling two stories." He laughed, and I tried to, but it hurt too much. "Well, if your pain levels are manageable, and nothing else seems wrong, you should be able to go home tomorrow or the next day. But you should take at least 3 weeks off of work. You're stitches will come out in two weeks, but it's always more safe to wait the extra week to make sure you won't rip open the cut."

"Don't worry," Kelly interjected, "he's going to be staying with me for the next three weeks, and there definitely won't be any working until then."

The doctor smiled. "Just let me know if you guys need anything." With that, he walked out.

"I didn't know I was going to be staying with you." I looked over to Kelly.

"Well, duh. Who else is gonna take care of you?"

"Dawson."

He glared at me. "Shut it, Casey."

I smiled, then yawned.

"Get some sleep."

"But, I didn't say I was-"

Kelly stopped me. "Get some rest."

I sighed, and didn't even bother to argue. I closed my eyes and was out like a light within 10 minutes.

~*****~

 

 "I'm glad I finally get to leave." Kelly helped me into my shirt, then helped with my shoes. "Kelly..you do know that I'm not helpless, right?"

"Fine, you try and bend over and get your shoes on." He stopped, and I frowned. "Yeah, that's what I thought." I lightly kicked him, and he flicked my foot.

"Hey! Dont you flick me." I bent over slightly and flicked his shoulder. "Now we're even."

He looked up at me and smiled. "All done." He got up and grabbed my duffle bag that I had to bring because I was put in the hospital for longer than I expected. "I have your bag, your phone, charger, and medications. Anything I'm forgetting?"

Me?" I held out my arms.

"I'm not going to carry you, Matt." He rolled his eyes and walked out of the room.

"Hey, it was worth a shot, right?"  
I sat down in the passenger seat and buckled up, waiting for Kelly to get in. "Come on, Kelly. I'm freezing."

He jumped into the driver's seat and buckled himself in, started the car, then turned on the heater. "Is that better?

I nodded. "Mhm."

He smiled. "Good. What do you want to listen to?"

"Uhm.." I thought for a moment, "Stix?"

"Stix? Come on."

I pouted. "What's wrong with stix?"

"Oh, please..denise young, a punk!"

"Denise Young is not a punk. He's Mr.Roboto, bitch."

Kelly laughed. "Okay, okay. We can listen to stix." He turned on the radio, and Frank Sinatra was playing.

"No, no. Leave it here."

"You're into Sinatra?" Kelly glanced over at me for a brief second, then put his eyes back on the road.

"Yes. I love him."

"Hmm." Kelly turned it up a little bit, then put both hands back on the wheel, and started tapping along to 'Luck Be a Lady'. I couldn't help but stare at him. He's like the perfect picture.."Don't think I don't notice that you're staring at me."

"And so what if I am?"

He shrugged. "I mean, I'm not saying that I mind." We came to a red light, and I un-buckled my seat belt. "What are you doing?" Ignoring Kelly, I moved right next to him and hesitantly wrapped my arms around him. I was relieved when he put one of his arms around me. "You know..if you wanted to cuddle up next to me, all you had to do was ask."

"You're ruining the moment, shut up." I rested my head on his chest. "I heard what you told me, yknow."

"What do you mean?" I felt the vibes of Kelly's deep voice against my cheek.

"When you told me how you felt about me.." I could feel him tensing up.

"You..you did..?"

I nodded. "Mhm."

"The doctor said you were supposed to be asleep.."

I shrugged. "I was in and out, I heard most of what you said."

I felt him shift. "I..didn't exactly plan on telling you..so soon..at least, I'm sorry if 've made things weird..or...you know...yeah.."

I looked up at Kelly. "You're getting all flustered." He started blushing. "It's okay, Kelly.." I paused for a moment, "because if I'm being honest, the feelings are mutual." I immediately felt Kelly relax, and then he tightened his arm around me. I smiled and snuggled in closer to him. _I love you, Kelly..._


	2. A conflict between two men

_Matt's P.O.V. . ._

 

"Kelly." I called out for him. "Kelly??" No answer. "I'm getting out of this bed and if you get upset with me, just know it's your fault." I uncovered myself and padded down the stairs, and into the kitchen. _Beer..where's the beer.._ I opened up the fridge. _Ah ha!_ I popped the cap off and took a sip, then grabbed some chips.

"Oh, yeah. Make yourself right at home." Shay came into the kitchen.

I smiled and threw a chip at her.

She caught it and put it into her mouth. "Thanks."

I laughed, then leaned up against the table. "So..where's Kelly?"

She pointed her head towards the couch and I noticed him laying there, with an arm and a leg dangling off. "Good..he finally got some rest," I paused for a moment to look at him, "he's been so worried about me, he's barely slept at all in the past week."

She shrugged. "That's just Kelly. When I got into the Ambo wreck a year ago, he wouldn't even let me get up to go grab a water bottle," She smiled, as if remembering that time, "he's like that over-protective big brother, yknow?"

I nodded. "But he's so focused on everyone else..he never worries about him. It's always me, or you, or the rest of fire house 51."

"Well," Shay walked over to me, "he's always been like that, you know that won't ever change."

"I know..but it should.."

Shay gave me an odd look. "You really care about him, dont you?"

I took a sip of my beer. "Yeah..I do."

"I've to go." She grabbed her jacket an keys. "Tell Kelly to come by Molly's tonight." She waved at me as she was walking away.

I waited until I heard the door shut, then I walked over to Kelly. Admiring the way he looked when he was asleep. So relaxed. I like him like this..I've never liked seeing him so tense. "You are one gorgeous man, Kelly Severide." I smiled, and grabbed the bag of chips, then walked back upstairs to lay down.  
An hour later, Kelly slinked into into the room. "Hey, sleepy head."

He rubbed his face, then yawned. "Hey." He flopped down next to me.

"How was your nap?"

"Oh, yknow," his voice was muffled, "it was okay."

"I think you need to sleep a little more."

He pulled his face away from the pillow and adjusted himself so he was looking at me. "I'm fine, I'm just a little drowsy."

I rolled my eyes. "You've slept maybe 7 hours in the past week, maybe. I'm gonna be just fine if you take a break."

He frowned. "I just want to make sure you're okay, that's all."

I sighed. "I understand that, but it works both ways. I worry about you just as much as you do with me."

He stretched out on the bed like a tabby cat. "Mmm..fine. I'll sleep some more, but," He pulled me next to him, and wrapped his arms around me, "you have to take a nap with me."

I smiled against his chest. "Deal." My shirt was off, and I felt Kelly's fingers running in circles on my side.

There was a good five minutes of silence, and then Kelly spoke up.

"I thought I was going to lose you.."

I looked up at him. "What do you mean?"

"When we were on our way to the hospital, Dawson said that your chances of making it were very slim..."

I could see the sadness in Kelly's eyes. "I'm fine though. Still around to annoy the hell out of you." Kelly softly chuckled. "Did you cry for me?" I was teasing, of course. I didn't expect a serious answer.

"I did, actually. One of the first times I've cried in a long time."

"So the big bad wolf has a soft side."

He laughed. "Only for you. Everyone else gets the hard ass lieutenant."

I scoffed. "Even I get the hard ass lieutenant, don't lie."

"Only when you piss me off."

I smiled again. "Which is pretty much all of my time."

He nodded. "Can't argue with that one."

I laughed, and snuggled in closer to him, sighing happily. "If only every day could be like this one."

Kelly looked surprised. "You mean you'd rather cuddle with me that fight blazing fires and save innocent people? Casey, I'm shocked."

I rolled my eyes. "Don't be a smartass."

"I mean it."

I frowned. "Are you asking if I'd give up my job for you?"

He was hesitant, at first. "Not..give up, persay..just...maybe take a break for awhile."

I pulled away from him and sat up. "Severide-"

He interjected. "I just...I can't continue to have a mini panic attack every time you run into a burning building, or anything of the sorts..this is a dangerous job and I don't want you getting hurt."

"That's what I signed on for, I knew what I was getting myself into, Kelly."

He sighed. "I know you know that, but I don't want you getting hurt again. I won't be able to handle losing you."

"So you want me to just give up my job because it suites you and what you want?" I immediately regretted the words as soon as they came out of my mouth. "Kelly..I'm sorry..I didn't mean that."

"Yeah," he sat up, "you did." He put a hand through his hair. "Look, I just don't want you getting hurt. I'm not saying give up your job. I'm saying..transfer to a different house, a less busy house. One where the risks aren't as high. Like 58, they aren't that busy."

 "Are you serious? Kelly, 51 is my home. I've been there since the day I graduated from the academy. I'm not just going to switch houses. I like being at 51."

Kelly got up. "Fine, whatever. I'm gonna stop by the house. I'll be back later." He put a shirt on and walked out.

I flopped down onto the bed and sighed. _It's not wrong for me to want to stay at 51. Yeah, it's the busiest house but I like that. Saving people. Of course it's a dangerous job, I knew that when I signed up to be a firefighter. I'm not going to just up and switch houses all because Kelly is worried about me._ I put my hands over my face. _Ugh._

~*******~

 

It was two and a half weeks later. Neither Kelly, nor I, spoke about the conversation that had happened. I was returning to work, under protest from Kelly, of course. "Come on," I grabbed my duffle bag and stopped just below the stairs, "if you don't move your ass, I'll leave without you."

Kelly jogged down the stairs and grabbed his bag. "Let's go then." He took the keys from me, and I rolled me eyes.  
We arrived at the house a couple of minutes late, "Would you calm down, Matt? Boden isn't gonna kill you for being," He glanced at his watch, "two minutes late." He pulled over onto the curb.

"Yeah." I grabbed my bag and hopped out of the car.

_"Truck 81, squad 3, ambulance 61, battalion 25. Structure fire, 4716 robb street."_

"Here we go."

Servide got out of the car and ran into the house, with me following. "Welcome back, Casey." He clapped me on the shoulder.

I threw my bag into the corner and stepped into my boots, putting on my fire gear. I pulled myself into the tuck, Otis, Herrmann, mouch, and cruz all got in at the same time. "Welcome back, Lieutenant." Cruz smiled at me, then started up the truck and pulled out.  
When we arrived at the scene, Kelly and I got out at the same time. "Alright," I put on my hat on, "Mouch and Otis, you're with m-"

Severide interrupted. "All of squad 3, go in for search and rescue, Cruz, and Herrmann, come with me. Casey, Otis, and Mouch, I'll tell you when to vent." Before I could protest, they were already going into the building.

Mouch got onto the truck and extended the latter. I watched severide disappear, then I started climbing up the roof with a hatchet in my hands. Once up top, I grabbed my radio. "We're on the roof, Severide. Just say when." I waited a couple of minutes."

"All clear, start venting." Kelly's voice rang over the radios.

Otis and I started working on it. "What was that back there, Lieutenant?"

"I don't know, but I'm gonna find out."  
Once we were back on the ground, and the fire was under control, I walked over to Kelly. "What the hell was that, Severide?"

He shrugged. "What do you mean?"

"I was giving an order and you stepped in, interrupted me, then sent me to the roof to vent. Mouch and Cruz always vent. I go in for search and rescue."

He shut the door to the truck. "Well, not today you didn't."

I pushed him against the truck. "You don't over step me in front of my own people, Severide. I was giving an order, you had no right to tell me to go and vent."

"Then why'd you listen in the first place?"

"Because, we were wasting time. Just don't do it again." I walked away and jumped back into truck 81.  
We got back to house and I put my bag away.

"Casey," Chief Boden stopped me, "my office, now." I followed him to his office where Kelly was waiting. "Shut the door." I shut the door behind me, and walked in front of his desk. "What the hell was that back there?" He glanced from me, to Kelly.

"I was giving a direct order, and Severide interrupted me."

He scoffed. "Please. I was just doing my job."

"Oh, really?" I turned to him. "Over stepping me is your job now?"

"Come on, Casey. Otis shouldn't be going in for search and rescues, he works the elevators. Mouch is in charge of the water pumps, you should be sending Cruz in."

"And what about me?" I crossed my arms over my chest.

 "I thought Otis could use some help."

"Really, Severide? It only takes two men to vent. Otis and Mouch. I should have been in there with you guys."

Kelly shrugged. "Things happen."

"Chief, this is ridiculous, he-"

Boden stopped me. "That's enough." He turned to Kelly. "You had no right to over step Lieutenant Casey, and it won't happen again." Then he tuned towards me. "He's not wrong either, Casey. Cruz and Herrmann should be going in with you. Mouch and Otis can come if need be. Now, do we all of an understanding?"

Kelly stood up, said, "Yes, Chief." Then walked out.

And I started to walk out, but Boden stopped me. "Welcome back, Casey."

"Thanks, Chief." I waked down the hallway into the lounge room. "Hey, Lieutenant!" Herrmmann pulled me into a brief hug. "Welcome back. How's the side?"

"Good as new."

"Good enough to take me on?" He started fake punching me and I pushed him away.

"Hey, Casey." Dawson waved at me from the table.

"Hey, Gabby." I looked at Mills. "Peter Mills, I'm starved."

He laughed. "Breakfast is coming right up, Casey."

Severide walked in, grabbed an apple, then walked back out. "Damn..you could practically feel the animosity between you two, what happened?"

I shrugged. "You know Kelly, he likes to pout a lot. So, what'd I miss?"  
For the next two hours, we talked about sports, how Molly's was doing, and Dawson announced that she was going to the academy to be a firefighter. This is what I miss most about being away from 51. My friends, and having a good time with them.

_"Battalion 25, ambulance 61, squad 3, truck 81. Apartment fire, 2910 Albany circle."_

We all got up and jogged out to the trucks. "What's up with all the fires around here?" Cruz jumped into the driver's seat, and I, into the passenger's seat.

"I don't know." I put my hat on.  
Once we arrived to the scene, my eyes wet wide.

Cruz was gaping as well. "Woah, Mama."

"Guys," I went on radio. "This is an all hands on deck situation, Chief, call for fire house 58." We all jumped out of the trucks. "Guys, masks on! Truck 81, let's move!" Once our masks were on, we all went into the burning building. "Let's start at the top." Once we all shuffled up the stairs, I stopped. "Cruz, and Otis, take all the apartments on the left side, Severide will have someone help. We'll take the right side, let's make our way down." I walked into the first apartment. "Fire department, call out!" I took out the thermal camera and did a clean sweep of the apartment, the next 3 apartments were empty, and Cruz, Otis, and Vargas met me at the top of the stairs. I went on radio again. "We're all clear on the fifth floor, chief. Severide, how are you guys doing?"

"All clear on the third and fourth floor, my guys pulled 4 out of the second, we'll take the last floor. You guys get out of here!"

"Negative. Truck 81 is going to help."

"No," Severide's voice rang out. "Get out of the building. We don't need more men down range than necessary."

"Truck 81..let's go!" We all made our way to the first floor, and started with the rescue. "Fire department, call out!" There was two kids trapped in their pantry. "Don't worry guys, we're gonna get you out of here." One of the kid's was burned pretty bad.I handed the little girl to cruz, and I carried the little guy out. Shay and Dawson were waiting. "This kid is burned pretty bad." Dawson nodded and rolled him off into the ambulance.

Severide came out a couple of minutes later. "What the hell was that, Casey?!"

"Just doing my job, Severide."

"I gave you a direct order, and you ignored it. What the hell were you thinking?" He pushed me up against the squad truck.

"You know what, it's a good thing I disobeyed, did you men look in apartment 3A?"

"Yeah, they did."

"Well," I pushed him away from me, "great job, Severide. They missed two kids that would've died if I hadn't have gone in there with my people. You're welcome." I walked away.  
  
~***~

Two days later, Kelly and I hadn't spoken a word to one another. I felt bad for saying what I did a couple of days earlier, but he needs to let me do my job. I shook my head, and walked into my office, closing the door behind me. Not more then two minutes later, Kelly walked in. "Can we..talk?"

I looked up. "Sure."

"Not here." He grabbed me and pulled me into the showering room. "Look.." He bit at his lip. "I'm sorry for the past couple of days..over stepping you and you know, everything else.." He paused for a moment, "I realize now that it was a bad idea. And also..I know I shouldn't have suggested you switch houses, or take a leave of absence. That was wrong of me..my feelings clouded my better judgment, I can assure you it won't happen again."

I tried stifle my smile. "Was that an apology, Serveride?"

He shrugged.

"Well, apology accepted. I just want to understand why you've been so testy with me lately, I-" He cut me off by putting his lips on mine. I was shocked, at first. Bu I gave into the kiss. He pulled away much sooner then I would've liked. "That's a really nice way of telling me to shut up."

He laughed and kissed me again, this time, he slipped his tongue into my mouth. I lightly moaned, and he pulled away again. "Good apology or no?"

"Great apology."


	3. working through our issues

_Matt's P.O.V. . ._

 

 _Fuck, my head hurts._ I stirred around a bit, then opened one eye to look at the alarm clock. I groaned inwardly. _Shift starts in two and a half hours._ Pulling the covers off of myself, I looked down. _Why am I naked?_ I rubbed my eyes, then grabbed my boxers off of the floor and put them on. "Ah, goddamnit." I tripped over my boots and fell. _Why didn't I put those away?_ I looked around on my floor. My eyes stopped when I saw a naked body laying on the floor opposite of where I had gotten up. _What in the world.._ I pushed myself up and walked over to the bed. I let out a breath as soon as I realized it was Kelly. I rolled my eyes and turned back around. _Wait..why is he naked?_ I turned back around and walked over to him. "Kelly." He didn't move. I kicked him lightly. "Kelly, get up." He still didn't move. I grabbed my phone, turned the volume all the way up, put it next to his ear, and started blasting 'Cherry pie'. He jolted awake, and hit his head on the bed. "Oh, shit..sorry." I turned off the music.

"Damn you, Casey." He sat down and rubbed the back of his head. "What was that for?"

I shrugged. "You wouldn't get up." I paused for a moment. "What, uhhh..what happened last night?"

He looked up at me. "You don't remember?"

I shook my head. And suddenly I went pale. "Oh god..we didn't.."

He put his hand up. "Necrophilia isn't really my thing."

I sighed. "Okay, good."

He frowned.

"Wait..I didn't mean that..I just..I meant...ugh, never mind." I threw his boxers at him. "Cover yourself up please."

He stood up and gave me a flirtatious smile. "Don't act like you don't enjoy the view."

I rolled my eyes and walked out of the bedroom. "I'm going to cook something."   
10 minutes later Kelly strolled into the kitchen and grabbed a cold Gatorade from the fridge. "Kelly Severide, drinking something that doesn't contain alcohol. Who would've thought."

He took a big gulp, then looked at me. "Are you trying to call me a drunk? Because," He paused to take another drink, "you would be completely right."

I stifled my laugh. "Are you hungry?"

He sat down at the island. "Starved. Whatcha making?" He looked over my shoulder.

"Pancakes, sausage, and hash-browns." He put three drops of syrup into the pan and let the sausage cook.

"What does that do?"

"Makes the sausage taste better." He grabbed a pierce. "Want to try it?" I nodded and he fed it to me. "Good?"

"Mmmm"

I smiled and turned off the burners, letting the sausage cool. "Let me grab a couple of plates and then we can eat." I pulled two plates out of the dish washer, as well as two forks. "Here," I set the plate in front of him. "Help yourself." I watched and Kelly grabbed his food, making fast and swiftly.

"Is there a reason why you're staring at me?"

I shrugged. Grabbing some food and sitting down, I stared to my pancakes for a couple of minutes. _I wonder why Severide always wants to hang out.._ The brief thought that he might be lonely crossed my mind, but I didn't want to think about being a last resort. Or maybe it's because he senses that I'm lonely. Ever since Hallie and I broke it off, I haven't got out very much.

"You know, you're supposed to eat the food. Not stare at it." Kelly jabbed me in the ribs.

"Why do you always want to hang out?" The words had left my mouth before I could even think.

"Uhm..is that a trick question?"

I sighed, and set my fork down, looking at him. "Why do you always wanna hang out with me? Or why did you watch over me when I got hurt? You don't have to treat me like a charity case, Severide."

Kelly set his fork down. "You're gonna have to help me out here, I don't really know what you're exactly  looking for rom this conversation."

"Is it because I didn't have Hallie to do it for me anymore?"

Severide looked shocked for a moment, but he recovered from it quickly. "You think that I wanted to watch over you after you got hurt because Hallie wasn't there to do it for you?"

I shrugged. "Do you feel bad for me or something? Is that why you always want to hang out? Or you just lonely?

Kelly got up. "I can't believe you.. I can't fucking believe you!" He stormed into the room and came out three minutes later with his shirt and pants on, coat in hand. "You know, Casey.. I thought that when I opened up to you about the feelings I had, you'd be smart enough to infer that I actually like being around you. Guess I was wrong about that one." He walked over to the door, then stopped. "And you know..if I was 'lonely' and wanted someone to hang out with, there's a whole group of people I would call before I called you, don't act like you're so special." 

I stood up. "Get out."

He gritted his teeth. "You're a real piece of work, Matt. You can't accept that someone might actually care about you, that's your problem." He opened the door, and slammed it shut behind him.

 

_Kelly's P.O.V. . ._

 

I threw my bag in the back of my car and got in the driver's seat. "Damnit!" I punched the steering wheel, immediately regretting it when my hand started to throb. "Fuck." Sighing, I started the car and drove down to the fire house.  
10 minutes later, I walked in and shift one was still going. I walked into the locker room and changed, then walked into the hangar where some of first shift was playing poker.

An hour later, Shay showed up with Dawson. "Hey, Kelly. No Casey?" I shook my head. "Did you guys fight or something?"

"Just go away, Shay." I walked into my office and slammed the door shut. _Damn him for making me so angry._ A couple of seconds later, there was a knock on my door. "I said go away, Shay!" Someone came in, and I groaned. "Did I say you could come in?"

"No, but this is my fire house, too."

 _Not Shay._ I turned around and saw Casey standing there. "This is also my personal space. And I would appreciate it if you would respect that."

He sighed, and leaned against my desk. "Look..I'm...I'm sorry about earlier."

I shrugged. "It's cool."

He frowned. "No, it's not, I shouldn't have-"

"Look," I stood up. "it isn't a big deal. We're at work now, so you do your job, and I'll do mine." I pointed out the door, and when Casey didn't move, I said. "I'd be more then happy to show you the way out." He pushed past me, then stopped in the middle of the hallway.

"You know what, Severide, have it your way. Leave me the hell alone."

"Gladly."

He gritted his teeth and stormed off, seconds later, Boden came out of his office. "Severide, in my office, now!" _Great._ Once we were both inside, he slammed the door. "What in the hell was that?"

"Casey and I just had a falling out, that's all, Chief." I stood with my hands behind my back, and my feet spread about 3 inches apart.

"Keeping those 'falling outs' away from my house, understood?"

I nodded. "Yes, Chief."

"I'll have a talk with Casey later. You're dismissed." He waved me out.

I turned on my heel and walked out. Right as I did, the alarm rang out.

_"Truck 81, Squad 3, ambulance 61, battalion 25. House fire 6720 Washington street."_

I jogged to the truck and got my gear on. "Where's Vargas?" Mills pointed towards the driver's seat. "Damn. Actually on time, imagine that." I jumped in.

"Dick." Vargas shook his head.  
Once we arrived on the scene, I jumped out and the rest of squad three followed suit. "Alright," I waited for truck 81 to come. "I want Cruz, Herrmann, Jones, and Casey to come in with me. Mills, stay with Shay and Dawson in case they need your help, the rest or squad, with me. Masks on, let's go." We all put our masks on and ran into the house. "Casey, Jones, come with me, Herrmann, cruz, and Vargas and Rice, take the upper level" They all dispersed into the flames. "The stairs leading to the basement don't loo stable. Wait for me to go down there. Let's do a sweep of this floor." I went go look in the first room. "Fire department, call out!" When no answer came, I took the thermal camera in there and did a clean sweep of the area before heading to the next room. "Fire department, call out!"

"Jones!!" I heard Casey scream and I ran out.

"What the hell happened?" Casey was standing above the stairs, which had crumbled down.

"We heard someone screaming downstairs, and...she.. fell." Two seconds later, her alarm sounded. "Damnit." Casey put the radio up to his mouth. "Mills, get in here. Bring some rope. Herrmann, come to the first floor,  Jones is hurt." Minutes later, Mills and Herrmann where by his side. "I'm going to go down and get her-"

I pushed him out of the way. "I'll do it." Once I was ready, they lowered me into the basement. "I'm tying jones to the rope, pull her out guys." They lifted her out then extended the rope to me. "Alright, pull." The pulled me out, and Casey had already carried Jones to Dawson and Shay. I ran out and saw Dawson, Shay, Casey, and Chief Boden.  _Oh_ no...I ran over to her. "Why aren't you guys helping her?" I looked to shay, and she cast her eyes downward. "Dawson?"

"Severide-"

"No," I shook my head, "do something!"

"Kelly.." Shay placed her hand on my shoulder, "she's gone."

I pushed her hand away and walked over to Casey. "This is your fault!" I pushed him against the truck, hard, "I told you not to go downstairs, and you ignored a direct order, and got Jones killed." Casey pushed me away and I gritted my teeth, taking a swing at him. My hand hit his jaw and he fell to the ground.

"Severide!" Chief Boden pulled me away. "Take squad three back to 51, now!"

I bit my tongue before I got into trouble. "You heard him. Let's go." We all got into the truck, and drove back to house 51.  
It was a couple of hours later, and Boden called all of us into the meeting room.

He looked around at all of us, then cleared his throat to speak. "I know all of you are upset about what happened today," He looked specifically at me, "we lost a good firefighter, and a friend." He picked up Jones' fire hat, and badge. "Jones will be missed. She may be gone, but she will always be apart of 51."

I got up and walked out of the room, Shay followed. "Kelly, stop."

I stopped and turn to look at her. "Boden wouldn't be giving us this talk if Casey would have just listened to me. Thinking of Casey, I realized h wasn't in the room. "Where was he, anyways?"

"At the hospital. You messed up his jaw pretty bad."

"Good, the bastard deserved a lot worse then that." I turned around and walked away.

~***~

It had been 2 weeks since the accident. Casey and I hadn't spoken a word to eachother, and for the most part, I was always in my office. I wasn't dealing with Jones' death very well. I trained her at the academy, and at first, I thought she was a stuck up brat. But she wasn't. She was sweet, and kind. Innocent. And a damn good firefighter. She didn't deserve to die. I sighed, and tried to push the thought away. It only made me angry. _I need a shower._ I went to my locker and grabbed a towel, then walked into the shower room. I glanced down to the floor, an saw  couple drops of blood. There was a trail. I followed it until I reached the second shower, someone was in there. I opened the curtain, and Casey was sitting there, fully dressed, letting the water stream over him. Part of me wanted to walk out, but I decided against it, Instead, I put my hand out and touched the water. It was ice cold. "Jesus Christ, Casey." I reached for the nob, and shut the shower off. "What are you doing? You're going to get yourself sick." He looked up to me, eyes rimmed red and water dripped off of his face. I knelt down next him. "Why are you bleeding?" He looked confused for moment. I shook my head and tried to find out where the blood was coming from. There was a red stain on the side of his shirt where his stitches used to be. "Casey, did you rip open that cut?" He looked down to his side, and just shrugged. I pulled him up. "Come on, let's get you to the hospital."

He pulled away. "No."

"Casey,' I tried to grab him, but he moved, "you need to have your side checked out."

He pushed me away. "I'm fine, just go away." He reached for the shower, and turned it back on. I shut it off. "What'd you do that for?"

I frowned. "You need to be seen. Look at your side."

He looked down, then back up to me. "I don't even feel it."

I sighed. "If you want go get seen, will you at least let me look at it?" He shrugged. "Okay.." I puled up his shirt, revealing the wound. It was still bleeding, not very healily, but not lightly either. "Is it okay if I put something on it?" He shrugged again. I grabbed the first aid kit and pulled out some gauze and adhesive tape. "If it hurts, just tell me." I cleaned it up, then covered it. "Better?" He nodded. "Alright." I put the first aid stuff away.

"It wasn't my fault.."

I turned around to face him. "What was that?"

He bit his lip, then swallowed. "It wasn't my fault." I could see tears welling in his eyes. "I told her not to go down, but she didn't listen. She took one step and just..fell..." He leaned against the wall and slowly slid down, putting his head in his hands, I watched as his body shook lightly from his crying.

"You told her not to go down?" He swiped at his tears, and nodded. _Way to be a douche bag, Severide._ I mentally kicked myself over and over again. "Matt..I'm sorry..." He started crying again, and I pulled him to his feet, then into my arms. He started sobbing into my jacket. I hugged him tightly and sighed. "I'm so sorry, Matt..I know I was a dick to you..and it wasn't even your fault.." I pulled him closer. "I'm so, so sorry."

He sniffled and pulled away. "I should've stopped her. It was my fault, just like Andy.."

I shook my head. "No, I was wrong, Casey. It was not your fault. You know how Jones was.. she was stubborn. She would've gone even if you tried to stop her. Same with Andy." I recalled my best friends death, and how he was already in the room before I told Casey that there wasn't a place to vent from.

He stayed silent for a couple of minutes. "I was in the work out room, and I guess I pushed myself a little harder then I thought."

I was confused. "What are you talking about?"

He motioned towards his side. "That's how I ripped the incision open."

"Does..does it hurt?"

He shook his head. "Oddly enough, no."

I sighed. "Will you please go to the hospital and get it looked at?"

He shrugged. "Whatever." 


	4. you have a problem

_Matt's P.O.V. . ._

 

"Come on, big guy." I put Kelly's arm over my shoulders to steady him. "Let's get you home, yeah?"

"I can walk on my own, Matty." He started smiling, and laughing like an idiot.

"Sure ya can." I pulled out my car keys and clicked the unlock button. "Do you want me to help you in?"

He shook his head and opened the passenger door, bending down to get in. I heard a smacking noise. "Ah, fuck." He stumbled into the seat, and I buckled him in, then shut the door and got into the driver's seat. "I think my head is bleeding."

He held out his hand and there was affair amount of blood on his fingers. "Oh..yep. Let's get you over to Chicago Med." When no protest came, I started up the car and headed to the ER. "Hi, my boyfriend hit his head pretty hard, an it stated to bleed so we thought it best to bring him here." The lady at the front desk handed me a sign in sheet, and some other additional paperwork.  "Thanks." I grabbed a pen and went over to sit down. "Okay.." I skimmed through the papers. "I already know most of this information, I'lljust have you sign when you have to, alright?" I looked over to Kelly, who was staring at the blood on his fingers. "Kel?"

He looked over to me. "Yeah?"

"Did you get any of that?"

"Uhm.." He shrugged.

I rolled my eyes, then smiled. "Let me fill out the paperwork, and you can sign, alright?" He nodded. "Blood type.. o negative..height..5'10..weight..eh, 145, roughly." I stated mumbling the questions and answers to myself. "past surgeries.. right shoulder.. Emergency contact..Matthew Casey, 719-397-5972..and, done. I just need your signature." I handed Kelly the pen and paper, he signed his name, and we walked back up to the front office. "Here you go." The lady smiled at me. "Let's go sit down down." I guided him back to the chairs.

"My head hurts."

I laughed. "Well..duh." I paused for a moment. "How much..uhh...how much did you drink?"

He scrunched his nose. "I lost track."

I sighed and looked down to my hands. "You know...this is Molly's seventh time of having to call me to come pick you up because you've drank too much.. Don't you think that..maybe you should, I don't know...lay off of drinking for awhile?"

He sighed and slumped down in his chair. "Or, maybe.. you could mind your own business and let me, do me."

"I know you miss her." It was just below a whisper.

He opened his mouth to say something, then stopped. "Kelly Severide?" A triage nurse walked out into the waiting room. Kelly stood up, then looked over o me, as if waiting. I smiled and stood up, following him into the tiny room they had set off to the side. "Alright, Kelly. If you'll just have a seat right here, I'll take your blood pressure, and temperature." I stepped off to the side and watched as the nurse put something over his first finger, then wrapped another ting around his arm. "Just relax." She took his blood pressure, and checked for signs of a fever, then wrote down the results. "Alright.." She looked at her computer. "Room 305 should be cleaned and ready. If you'll just follow me." I grabbed a cup of water before we headed down. She smiled at Kelly and I, then led us down a hallway. "Here we are." She waited until we were both in the room. "You're doctors name is Hallie. She should be here in about a half hour or so." I started choking on the water I had just swallowed. She looked worried. "Is something wrong?" I shook my head. "Well..uhm.. Is there anything you two need before I go?"  I shook my head, and Kelly followed suit. "Alighty then, well, you gentlemen have a good night. I hope everything turns out okay." She smiled and put on some hand sanitizer before leaving the room.

"Hallie is going to be your doctor." _Fuck me, right?_ "This should be interesting." Kelly sat there, staring a the, now dried blood, on his fingers. "Kelly.." He didn't respond. I sighed and watched him for a little while. I was at loss on words to say to him. I knew all the words in the world couldn't heal him of the pain he was feeling. In all honesty, nothing really can. Not like I can blame him. Shay was his best friend, and when he lost her, he lost apart of himself as well. I know I have to be patient with him. Part of me is wondering if he's channeling his pain into something else, like drinking, for instance. Kelly has never been known to face a problem head on. He evades it until he just can't anymore. And that just isn't healthy. When he injured his shoulder, he waited 6 and a half months to tell Chief Boden. And let me tell you what.. that was like adding fuel to a fire. It wasn't pretty.

My thoughts were interrupted by Hallie. "Hey, Casey." She gave a grim smile. "So what happened, Severide?"

He shrugged. "Just a little bump on the head is all."

She pulled out a mini flashlight. "Can you sit up for me?" He peeled himself off of the bed. "Alright. I want you to track the flashlight." She shined it in both eyes. "You look good. No signs of a concussion..the bleeding doesn't always mean bad. I'll send you home with some stuff for the headache you'll have for the next couple of days. Other than that, you're good to go. I'll get you the discharge papers." She glanced over at me, then quickly looked away.

"Don't tell me you still have a thing for her." Kelly rolled his eyes.

"First of all, you're the drunk one in this situation. You're in no place to pass judgment. Second of all," I paused, and smirked. "Why do I need her when I have a very sexy firefighter?"

Kelly looked amused. "Oh, and who is this firefighter?"

"You don't know him. I'll have to introduce you sometime."

He grabbed his shoe and threw it at me. "Jackass."

~***~

_Kelly's P.O.V. . ._

 

It was 4 weeks later, I walked up to Matt's door, and hesitated before knocking. I sighed. _Just knock._ I knocked swiftly, four times, and he answered. "Hey," He smiled. "Come on in." He motioned his hand, and I stepped in. Dawson was in the living room.

"Hey, Kelly."

I smiled. "Hey..wow, uhh..the new place is nice."

She shrugged. "Eh."

"Come on," Matt clapped me on the shoulder, "bedroom is this way."

I turned around to face Gabby. "Hey.. thanks for this."

She gave me a warm smile. "Yeah, no worries. Glad you're here"

I turned back around and followed Matt. "Yeah, so, uhh, here's the room. There's some spare sheets and blankets over there." He motioned over to a shelf.

"Thanks...it's just for a little while."

"Oh, no worries," He waved his hand. "Stay for as long as you need." He walked out of the room, and I took my bad off of my shoulder. I was about to walk back out into the living room when I overheard Dawson and Matt.

 _"Alright, I'll see you after work?"  
"Yeah."  
"It's good that he's here. It makes all the difference when you have someone to talk to."  _ She was trying to whisper.  
_"Yeah...see you after work."_

I heard the door shut, and I sat on the bed, waiting for Matt to leave.  
35 minutes later, I walked into Boden's office. "Okay, love you." He hung up the phone.

I smiled and put my hand out. "Hey, Chief."

"Kelly," He reached out and briefly shook it. "How you doing?"

"I'm good, thanks."

He sighed, and nodded. "You ready to be back at work?"

I looked down to the floor, then back up to him. "If I wasn't, I wouldn't be here."

He stared at me for a couple of seconds, then walked behind me, and shut the door. I turned around. "Kelly, listen, you do know that there if grief counseling available."

I shook my head. "I'm good." He was about to responded, when the sirens sounded.

_"Ambulance 61, Truck 81, Squad 3, boat accident, 22nd and elm."_

Boden stepped out of the way, and I walked out of his office and onto the apparatus floor.

Newhouse was adjusting his straps. "Hey, look who finally came down from the mountain."

"Ohh," Mills pulled on his boots, "I've never seen him before."

Capp smirked. "You sure you remember how to do your job, Lieutenant?"

 I pulled on my boots. "Forgetting is better than never knowing, Capp." We all smiled, and got into the truck. I was about to sit down when I saw that very familiar blond pony tail bouncing back an forth. I froze. The girl got into the ambulance, and I saw her face from the mirror. My heart sunk and I got in, shutting the door.  
When we arrived on scene, I saw two guys frantically flagging us down. We pulled in and I jumped out. There was a hysterical women there. "Oh,help..oh, please, save him. Oh, god..hold on, honey." She was talking to the man pinned down by part of a trailer.

Boden stepped in. "Please stand back, ma'am."

She was crying. "Please, don't let it fall.. I left the truck in drive."

Casey interjected. "You have to give us room so we can lift this trailer of off him."

She started screaming. "You don't understand, my daughter is in there, my daughter!!" Otis and Herrmann had to hold her back.

Boden stepped onto the ledge. "Help! Help me!!" We heard screams coming from the front.

He reached for his radio, then stopped. "What's your daughter's name?"

The woman took a breath. "Lana."

"Lana," Boden bent over slightly. "Firefighters are on their way. Stay as still as you can."

"O-okay.." You could hear the fear in her voice.

"Mills," I motioned towards the car, "wrap a sling around this frame, Capp," I pointed to him, "get the winshcable ready. Let's go."

"Alright, chop, chop!" Boden was anxiously waiting.

Capp hooked me up to the cable. "Alright, Tony, take the winshcable back slowly 'till we get some tension in the line." I felt the cord. "Alright, we're good, Cas."

"Okay, Cruz, let's go." Cruz sarted up the sawzaw and cut through the piece pinning the man.

"I'm through." He pulled back and him and Casey pulled the piece off of the man.

"Watch his head." Boden helped.

They took care of the victim while I got harnessed in. "Lana, I'm coming down to get you." The guys motioned tony to let me down, and I slowly made my way towardsthe front of the car. "Alright, alright!" I stopped moving. I saw the girl sitting in the passenger seat. Newhouse had followed me down on the opposite side. "Newhouse, see if you can kill the engine without moving the truck." He pulled the keys out of the ignition. "Okay, Lana, I know you're scared, but I need you to trust me, okay?" She slowly nodded. "K.. lock eyes with me." I paused. "You good?" She gave a 'mhm." "Okay, slowly hand me your right arm," She extened her arm. "Good, that's good, slowly make your way up," She stepped up. "Alright, that's good, you're doing great." She was 1/4 of the way out and I grabbed onto both of her hands. "I want you to lunge into my arms, okay?" She nodded. "Okay, ready? 1, 2, 3, jump." She lunged and I wrapped my arms around her. The guys started pulling her and I up. "Nice work, you're doing great." They pulled us over the edge and I set her down. She ran into her mom's arms.

"Mom!" She started crying.

Boden looked over to me. "Welcome back, Lieutenant." I took deep breaths, and shook his hand. I watched as 5 packed up all of the gear.  
I was sitting at the table reading the paper when I heard a plate being set down. "Hey, Lieutenant," I looked up, "I just wanted to formally introduce myself. I'm Sofie Brett." She put out her hand.

I took it. "Kelly Severide."

"Yeah, I've uh.. I've heard a lot about you," She sat down, "Uhm.. I just want you to know that I'm uh.. I'm really honored to be on ambo 61."

"Uhh huh, well, welcome aboard." I pushed my chair out and grabbed the paper, walking out of the dining hall.  
I saw Casey and I walked up to him.

"Hey," He looked me up and down. "4 weeks of nothing, and then you suddenly drop by?"

"I uhh.." I felt guilty for a moment, "went off the grid for awhile, I didn't reach out to anybody."

He shook his head. "You don't have to explain anything." I bit my lip, and nodded. "Kelly, I'm so sorry about Shay."

I mumbled, "Yeah, thanks."

"How you holding up? The last time I saw you, you were drunk and being discharged from the hospital."

I shrugged. "I'm good. I just wanted to say sorry, I didn't get the chance to this morning.. maybe you'd wanna get together sometime? Outside of the house and work."

"You wanna grab a drink after shift?"

"Oh..uhh..I can't tonight. I told capp and some of the other guys that I'd meet up with them tonight, so don't wait up at your apartment. But, soon. We'll do it soon."

"Aright," He smiled, "you just let me know." he turned around and walked back into the house.  
After shift, I went straight to the bar.

The next morning, I took some headache medicine with my coffee. Casey walked in, and clapped me on the shoulder. "Looks like you had a late night last night."

I lightly bit my lip. "Something like that, yeah." I paused for a couple of seconds. "So, uhh.. what did you do last night?"

He shrugged. "Just played some video games with Gabby."

I nodded. "Sounds like you had a better night than I did." I mumbled.

"What was that?" He looked over to me.

"Oh, nothing. Just talking to myself." I grabbed my coffee and walked out.  
I was walking down the hall when Newhouse's daughter stopped me. "Oh.. Lieutenant, can I ask you something?" I stopped.

"Yeah, what's up?"

She looked back over to the wall where all of our pictures hung. "How come my Dad isn't in any of these pictures? I mean, he's been here for awhile now."

I walked over to her and started searching the wall. "Ah," I pointed. "There he is, front and center." I looked the picture for a moment, and then I saw Shay and I. I had my arm draped over her shoulders. _Damnit._ I sighed and turned to walk away.  
"Hey, hey! Knock it off!" Herrmann teased me.

I laughed. "Oh, were just playing around. You know what, I got ss..I got a queston for ya. You are like, begging to kill this place. I got something I don't understand. Fill th..Fill up the damn snack bowls to the top. What are you doin? Fill these things up!" I held up the bowl. I heard Herrmann and Otis talking.

 _"How many has he had?"  
_ Otis looked over to me. _"Many."_

"There's no pretzels, there's just peanuts. You could put cashews, all other kinds of treats that you eat at the bar. There's lots of-" I stopped when Brett walked over. "Hey, there she is!" I patted the seat next to me. "Come on over."

"Uhh," She sat down. "Herrmann told me to come by so."

"I bet! Grab a seat, make yourself at home." My words were getting more slurred.

"Hey, Brett, thanks for coming by." Herrmann shook her hand.

"What are you..uh...what are you drinking?" I took a sip of my beer.

"Vodka and cranberry please."

"No, no, no. She doesn't want that." I paused for a moment. "Uhh..uh...uh, two scotch and sodas." I stared at her and started touching her hair. "Wow."

She looked over to Herrmann, then back to me. She laughed. "What?"

I looked over to Herrmann. "It's crazy, right?" Brett looked confused. "I mean, hey..hey, come on, Herrmann. I'm not the only one who sees it, right?"

"See what?" She looked from me, to Herrmann.

He shook his head. "Herrmann, what the..I ordered some drinks. Where are the drinks?"

He come over to me. "I think you've had enough."

"Wha..come on, come on man. I'm not drive..don't, don't worry about it."

"Look," He paused, "I'm your friend, and I'm telling you I think you've had too much to drink. There's people that you work with here."

"What are you talkin about? Her?" I motioned towards Brett. "What are you..I'm just...I just playing around, just having some fun. No..her?"

She looked uncomfortable. "Let me uhh..let me find you cab."

I smiled. "That's funny. Haha..are you guys..are you putting me on?" I looked over to Herrmann. "Guys, I'm sitting down, having a drink, enjoying myself now all the sudden it's an intervention?"

"Nah, nah nah nah. Come on." He walked around to me. "It's just your buddies wanting to make sure you get home safe. Come on, Kelly. Let's go."

"You know what," I threw my hands up in the air. "Brett, come on," I got up. "You and me. We're going over to game day, it's right down the street, we're gonna go, we're gonna have a blast." I put my coat on.

Otis stepped in. "Game day burned down."

"Oh, yeah. Uhmm," I thought for a moment, "Townlounge." Brett looked down to the floor. "Anybody?" I looked around. "Alright, fine, later." I walked out. I was walking for what seemed like only a little while, but when I looked around me, I was on Washington street. I went over to a bench and sat down, putting my head into my hands. The alcohol was wearing off. "Damnit!" I screamed and felt a couple of tears fall. "Damn you, Shay..." It was just above a whisper. "Why did you have to leave me?" I looked up the sky. "Huh?! Why'd you have to go?!" I got angry and turned around, punching a wall, then slowly sinking to the ground. "I miss you goddamnit..."

 


	5. coming around

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Matt's point of view in this chapter is going to be short but I felt like I should put it in somewhere.

_Kelly's P.O.V. . ._

 

I was going through my locker when Brett walked by. She stopped. "How you doing, Lieutenant?"

I glanced over to her, then back to my locker. "Good." I shut my locker and put the lock back on, Brett turned around and walked away. I was about to walk back to the apparatus floor when Herrmann passed by, and walked into the bathroom.

 _"Hey."  
"Hey." _ Casey was in there.  
_"Severide still staying at your place?"  
"Yeah, why?"  
__"Eh..he was at Molly's last night, ten sheets to the wind. He say anything about it?"  
"No, I didn't see him. I just thought he crashed at a frined splace or something like that."  
"Ahh..guys on first watch said he came in last night after bar time. Went to sleep in the bunk area until shift started. Second time this week."  
"Mmm..I'll check in with him. Thanks, Herrmann."  
__"Yeah."_

I chose to ignore the conversation I'd over heard, and to walk to my office. I sat down, and started on some paperwork. Roughly five minutes later, Casey walked in. "Hey." He leaned against the door frame. "Wanna get some dinner tomorrow, after shift?"

I shrugged. "Yeah, sure. That sounds good." I set my pen down. "Just next me when and where, Lieutenant."

Casey was about to respond, but was cut off by the alarm going off.

_"Amulance 61, Squad 3, Truck 81, victim injured in utility home."_

Casey and I both jogged out to the trucks and suited up.  
Once we arrived on scene, we came to realize there wasn't anyone around. I jumped out of the truck about the same time as Casey did. "Fire department." He looked around.

I did the same. "Where's the victim?"

Casey looked confused. "Well.. who called it in?"

I waved my hand around. "Spread out and look around." Truck 81 and squad three dispersed, and started scanning the grounds.

Capp stopped. "Hey, over here!" We all walked over to him.

There were two male victims who had fallen into a pretty steep hole. Casey bent down. "Guys, can you hear me?" No response came.

"The victim on top is breathing, I can't get a read on the one under him." Newhouse looked down.

I was behind Casey. "There's not enough room to get down there and carry them up...Mills," He looked up to me, "we can lower you in upside down. Get the victims handcuffed to some webbing, we'll pull them up."

"Okay." Mills got up to get ready, and chief Boden pulled in.

While Cruz was moving the ladder, Casey and I were looking at the victims. "Casey, right there, check it out." I pointed to a cell phone.

He looked around for a moment. "Top victim is holding a cell phone. He must be the one who called for help."

Mills looked confused. "But if he was okay when he called, how come he's unconscious now?"

Dawson interjected. "They could've hit a gas pocket, they could be asphyxiated."

I lightly pushed on Mill's shoulder. "Let's mask up."

Boden was talking into his radio. "I'm gonna need hazmat, and two back up ambulances' at 8922 vex street."

Mill's put his mask on and Newhouse tightened his harness. I rotated my hand, mimicking the 'up' position. "Let's get him up." He was slowly lifted off of the ground. "Alright, stop." He flipped himself upside down. "You ready?"

"Yeah." He was lowered down very slowly into the hole.

"Winsh line coming down." I sent down the line.

He hooked one person into it. "We're good to go!" We lfted the first victim out.

"Okay." Dawson andBrett took care of him.

"Hang on Mills, okay?" I sent another line down and he looked the other victim up.

"Good to go!" We lifted the last person out.

I held onto Mills' line. "Alright, Mills, we're bringing you up." I saw him limply hanging there. "Mills!"

Boden cut in. "Pull him up, fast!"

Otis was trying. "Get him up damnit, go!" I looked back down. "Mills."

Casey tugged at the line. "The line is stuck."

I bent down again. "Mills!"

"Come on, pull harder!" Boden was yelling.

"Mills!!" I continued to scream down to him. I started to panic. "His mask have enough until the gas gets to him?" Before I could get an answer Casey ran over.

"Here, I'll try to un-stag him." He tuck a pole down there and tried to free up the line. It took him a couple of tries, but he got it. "He's loose." Otis and Herrmann started to pull him up.

"Hang on, Mills." I anxiously waited. Once he was up, we set him down and removed his mask.  

"The mask is secure, breathing normally." Dawson evaluated him.

Mills took a couple of deep breathes. "What the hell happened down there, Mills?" I kneeled down beside him.

He shook his head. "I don't know..it started to get hard to breathe and I..I must've blacked out." He let his head rest on the ground.

Newhouse interjected. "Maybe his SCBA malfunctioned because he was upside down."

Brett listened to his lungs. "Well, whatever it was, his vitals are stable." She looked up to me, "he's okay."

Boden nodded. "Glad you're alright, Mills. Capp," He looked over to capp. "check out hat equipment when we get back to the house."

It was a couple of hours after shift, and I caught up to Casey. "Matt, hey. Listen, I uh.. I.. I messed this one up, my bad. I was on my way, I stopped at a bar, watched the cubs. Ahhh... I just lost track of time."

He shrugged. "It's okay."

"Yeah?" I smiled.

"Look, Kelly, " He paused, "you and me, we're cut from the same cloth, alright? I've been where you are, and I know how hard it is, and I know you gotta to whatever you've gotta do to deal with that. So, I will be here for you, no matter what, but I will not be the guy sitting alone in a restaurant, waiting for you."

I bit my bottom lip, and stayed silent for a couple of seconds. I felt tears stinging my eyes. "She was my.. she was my best friend."

Casey nodded. "I know." He pulled me into a hug and couple of tears slipped down my cheeks. "It's going to be okay."

~*****~

_Matt's P.O.V. . ._

 

It was the next day, and I was sitting in my office. The alarms sounded.

_"Engine 51, truck 81, squad 3, ambulance 61, structure fire. 16th and walbash."_

I ran out to the truck and got ready, jumping in. Cruz drove off. "I can already see the smoke, boys. Looks like it's rolling."

"Oh, boy," Herrmann shifted in his seat, "hey, Casey, we're neck and neck with your old pal, welch." I looed over and saw truck 66.

"Don't worry casey, I got this." Cruz smirked.

"I'm not interested in a pissing contest, welch wants this fire, he can have it." Cruz frowned. "Cruz, forget it. Just drive the truck."

"Great," Otis sighed, "Welch is gonna get there first and we'll be taking orders from him."

"Eh, I don't see them anymore."

"See," I looked over to Casey, "all works out in the end." Three seconds later, I was being jerked around, I felt the truck tip over and slam againt the pavement, there was glass in my face. "Ahh.." I felt a stinging pain in my head, and I blacked out.  
When I came to, I saw Cruz gripping onto the wheel and shaking. "Cruz, you okay?" Before I could get an answer, I heard the sirens, then a couple of minutes later, I heard Severide's voice.

He hopped onto the side of the truck. "You guys alright, any injuries? Case, you okay?"

"Mouch is hurt." I looked down to Otis and mouch. "This is bad." I pulled myself out of th truck while Newhouse, and Kelly looked at Mouch and Otis. "Cruz, you okay?" He stared blankly. "Cruz!" He shook his head and looked up to me. "We're gonna get you out of here." I jumped down and ran over to truck 66, and helped one of the firefighters out. "You alright?" He was holding his arm.

"Don't worry about me, Parrish has got a busted leg, the bone is showing and everything." I tried to steady him.

"I'll take are of him, okay?" Mills walked away.

I tried to lead the firefighter to the side walk. "Take a seat over here."

He pulled away. "Why don't you guys learn how to drive? I mean, damn Lieutenant, what the hell?"

I grabbed his arm. "Let's move out of the way."

He struggled. "No, I'm not going anywhere-"

"Seriously," I cut him off, "you're looking a little pale. C'mon." I took him to the side walk, and he sat down. I walked back over to 66 where Welch was just coming out of the truck, and he went right back into the back of the truck. I sighed and walked away.

_Kelly's P.O.V. . ._

"Watch his arm, you're too close." Welch was barking orders.

"I see his arm, I got it. Alright, Mills. Go ahead." He was about to start prying at the door, when he stumbled backwards. "Mills." He started to fall of off the truck. "Mills, hey! Mills..damnit." I ran over to him, and he was trying to push himself up. "What the hell happened?"

"I don't kno, I just.. I wasn't paying attention."

"Capp," I helped Peter up, "you relive Mills on the roof, Mills, you take a breather."

"No," He stood up, "I got it."

I put my hand on his chest. "Take a breather."

Welch picked up the sawzaw. "Can't you guys do anything right? My guys is going to die in here!"

Casey and I had to hold him back. "They're giving it their all, Welch." Matt looked him dead in the eye. "They're trying like hell."

"That's my best friend in there." He looked shaken up.

"Yeah, I know. They're gonna get him out."

"Agghh," I pulled on the door. "Alright, Capp, you ready? Go." He pried at the door and it started to open up. "Alright, get a back board over here!"

WhenI got a minute alone with Casey, I pulled him into a hug. "Tank god you're okay." I briefly kissed him on the cheek.  
"I guess they were trying to come across from Michican, but they had to have known we were coming up walbash," Herrmann leaned against the wall, "right?"

"Either way," I paused, "they gotta slow down and have a look. Everyone knows that."

"Unless they had the green." Newhouse chimed in.

"Please, Hermann scoffed, "they did not have the green. What the hell, Newhouse?" He rolled his eyes

Capp looked impatient. "Are the cops still all over Cruz?"

"Yeah," Otis interjected, "now they're demanding piss, and blood." He lookd over to Herrmann.

"Standard procedure."

We were all silent for a moment. "Is that Melina's wife?" He looked down the hall.

My heart dropped when I saw her fall to he floor crying. Herrmann spoke up. "Poor kid." 

Casey approached me, and went in for a hug, but I stopped him. "Wait, wait, wait, not here." He stopped. "I'm sorry."

He cleared his throat. "Uhh.. god news on Mouch, he's still gonna be able to watch TV with both eyes."

"Okay, good. That's really good. I'm gonna go check in on him." I clapped Casey on the shoulder and stepped away.  
When we were all on our way ourt, I caught up to Mills. "Hey, wait up." Once I was caught up, I started talking. "Pretty nasty spill you had back there, what happened?"

He shrugged. "Yeah, just.. got sloppy, I guess."

I shook my head. "You don't get sloppy, Mills."

He adjusted his radio. "It's nothing, I, uhm.. I've been getting dizzy."

I stopped him. "Since when?"

"Since the building collapse, I guess," He paused, "it's all those pain meds for my leg, it's just taking awhile to go away."

I nodded. "Go see a doctor."

"Yeah," He looked down to the floor, "I will if it doesn't clear u[ soo-"

I interrupted him. "Before next shift."  
I was just leaving my office when Casey was approaching me. "Do I have clearance to hug you now?"

I lightly laughed. "You do." I pulled him into my arms. I sighed. "When that mayday came through from ambo 61.."

"I know." He pulled away. "But, I'm okay."

I half smiled. "So, Boden's sending you home, huh?"

"Yeah, he looks out for his people." Casey looked at me, then to my lips, then back up to my eyes again. I bit my lip and pulled him in for kiss.

"I'm so glad you're okay."


	6. Give it all to me

_Kelly's P.O.V. . ._

 

"Ready..go!" I dropped my shot glass into my beer glass, the other two guys followed suit. I downed the drink and slammed the cup into the bar while the other two finished. "Ahh, I kicked your ass, I kicked your ass!" I pulled them under my arms and started teasing them. "Yeahhh! Mick," I set the money that I had just won down onto the table, "put this down.. on a round for everyone." They all started hooting and hollering. I smiled as I opened a cigar and put it into my mouth.

"Come on, Kelly. You gotta take that outside." The bartender interjected.

"What are you talking about? All the money I put away here and I can't enjoy one smoke?"

He glanced over at me. "Take it up with the Mayer."

"Alright, maybe I will," I put the cigar back into it's plastic wrapping, "take it up with the mayer." I nodded at the bartender and put on my coat, then reached for my eyes.

He promptly took them away. "You've had six irish shots, and three scotch and sodas. If I buy that ride of yours, I want it in one piece." He jingled my keys then put them into his pocket.

"You're a real pal, Mick." I waved and stepped out of the bar, stopping to look at my car. _Don't even think about it._ I put the cigar into my jacket pocket and headed towards the subway. I got onto the A train so I could get home, well, to Casey's place, anyways. I took a seat at the back of the train and crossed my arms over my chest, closing my eyes.  
The train jolted to a stop, and the lights flickered for a couple of seconds before going out. A girl ran through the door. "Somebody's shooting!" Two other people came after her. I got up and headed to where they had just came from. I heard another shot and I ducked for a couple of seconds, then got back up, I saw someone in a military uniform, I quietly came up behind him, holding my hand up.

 "Why'd you do that? I told you to stay put!" He was pacing.

"Sir,"A women was speaking to me, "you need to go back, go back now!"

The guy turned around and put the gun to me. "You aint going nowhere." My breath caught, and I put my hands up.

I looked over to the women who told me to leave, she had a gunshot wound to the left shoulder, and her breathing was shallow. "Ma'am, just put pressure on it."

"Talk to me, not her!" The shooter pointed to the women.

"Okay, " I backed down, "relax, you're the man in charge."

He pointed to the lady again, while keeping his eyes, and his gun, on me. "This is her own damn fault. Tryin to stop be from doing my business."

"You did what you came here to do," I tried to coax him into leaving, "nothing's holding you here."

He shook his head. "It ain't that simple."

"Boy," The women who had been shot spoke up, "why don't you listen to the man?"

He gritted his teeth, then turned to face her. "You.. you don't get it. You already saw too much!" I took the opportunity to disarm the man by punching him in the jaw, he slammed my head against the metal frame, then hit my in my ribs, and kneed me in side. I punched him in his gut, then hit his jaw again. He fell to the floor. I was holding my head as I picked up the gun and walked over to the injured lady, throwing the gun out of the window and onto the tracks.

I kneeled down beside her. "Let me see." She shifted so I could see the wound better. "Hit your clavical.." I examined the back of her shoulder. "And no exit wound. How's your breathing?" She took in a couple of deep breaths. "Okay, good." I looked around, and found a scarf laying right next to me. I grabbed it and handed it to the lady. "Keep pressure on it." I took my phone out of my pocket.

"Forget 911, there's no reception this far underground." She tried to get up. "I got a radio in my cabin..ah!"

"Hey, hey hey!" I helper her sit down again, "the more you move, the more you bleed, okay? I'll get the radio." I got up and walked over to the train radio.

"He wasn't alone.. the other one went out the back."

"Just keep pressure on your wound."I turned around. I heard someone pick up on the other line. "Yeah, this is train uh.." I looked for a train number, "2509, we have gunshots fired. One dead, one wounded."

_"Copy, 2509. Unies are being dispatched. Stand by."_

  
"Alright," I took in a couple of breaths, "tell them to hurry up. She's loosing a lot of blood, I need paramedics-" I was cut off by a bullet being shot through one of the windows, I ducked and dropped the radio. "Hey, come on!" I grabbed the lady and we jumped off of the train. Another shot was fired. I grabbed the loose chain hanging off and wrapped it around the door so the shooter wouldn't be able to open it. "Where's the next platform?"

"Washington Stations is the last one open at this time of night." The shooters started banging against the door.

"Keep moving!" I held onto her. "Is there a closer station?" 

"On, but it's offline. No street access."

"You can do this," I looked her in the eyes for a moment, "show me, come on." We ran up some stairs and into a deserted station. "Right over there." I led her to a wall and sat her down. "So why the hell did you jump in front of a bullet?"

"These gangs have been ruining lives in my neighborhood for as long as I can remember. The only way to survive is to keep your head down and pretend it's not happening," She looked over to me, "I just got tired of pretending."

"Yeah." I started to un-button her shirt so I could clean up the wound.

"You're no different," She gabbed onto my arm, "you ran into my car like some kind of maniac."

"Yeah, well," I looked around the room to make sure no one had followed up, "you either gotta move forward or backwards, right?" She nodded. "Alright..the bullet is close to your lung. We're gonna need to seal it so no air gets in, okay?" I took the plastic off of my cigar.

"Okay."

"You're doing great, okay.. hold that there," I placed the piece of plastic over the hole, "keep pressure on it. Hold it there." I stood up and looked around again. "The cops aren't going to know to look for us here so I'm gonna try to make a signal." I walked over to some crumbled up paper and discarded cloth .

"You a doctor?"

"No," I glanced over to her for a minute, then back at the task at hand, "a firefighter." I bent down and took out a box of matches that were in my pocket.

"Maybe you miss your calling." She smiled.

"My best friend was a paramedic," I glanced over to her again, "she drilled this kind of stuff into me."

She was silent for a moment. "Amen to her."

I froze for a couple of seconds. _Come on, Severide. Not now. Don't do this now._ I shook my head a lit a match, bringing it over to the paper. "Okay," I lightly blew to pick up the flames, "alright, there we go. Okay, we just need enough smoke to trip this alarm," I looked up to the fire alarm on the wall, "cops'll be here in no time, okay?" I looked over to the women and saw that she was crashing, "hey!" I got up and ran over to her. "Hey, come on, hey.. you gotta stay awake," She started fall over and I caught her, "you gotta stay with me, okay?"

"Well, look at here."

I turned around and I saw the second perpetrator with a gun to my head. I put one hand up in the air,  and kept the other one on the women's wound to keep it from bleeding.

The man handed the gun to the guy that I had previously knocked out. "Finish this, Andre. Do it."  The alarm started going off, and I shifted so I was blocking them from shooting the women. "That ain't gonna help either one of you fools." He paused for a moment, then looked over to whom I know knew as Andre. "Come on man, do it!"

He bit his lip. "Come on, man-"

The second gunman stopped him. "They're witnesses."

"Andre," I interjected, "you're the one with the gun, okay? You can walk away from this still."

"St.. stop talking to me. Alright? Stop talking!!" He put the gun to my head, my breath caught. He was visibly shaking. A couple of seconds later, he took the gun off of me. "Ahh!!!"

The second guy walked over to him. "Give me that gun! If you won't do it, I will." I stood up, but was too late. He aready had the gun and took a shot at me, it missed. And right as he did, the officers came in.

"Get on your knees, drop the gun!!"

I turned my attention back towards the lady. "Hey, hey," I bent down and started to care to her again, "I need an ambulance over here, now!"

One of the officers grabbed her radio and spoke into it. "2113 emergency. Roll an ambulance to Belmont station. We've got a victim with a gunshot wound to the chest."  
About 10 minutes later, I walked up the stairs and out of the station, I saw them wheeling the women into the ambulance. "Severide," One of the officers stopped me, "that fire alarm was good thinking."

The other officer walked up. "Hey, how about we give you a ride home?"

I shook my head. "No, I'm good, thanks, I'm-"

The male officer stopped me. "Actually, we can't let you go yet. Not until homicide gets your statement."

_It's gonna be a long night._

~*****~

 

It was the next day, and I was in my office, I stepped out, and ran into Casey.

"Hey, I guess crashing here is your way of skipping out on paying rent."

"No, I.. uhh, I lost my key," I paused for a moment, "I didn't wanna wake you guys up."

He stopped and turned to face me. "How'd you get the shiner?" He motioned towards my eye. "Hit on the wrong guy?"

I looked down to the floor. "Something like that." I shrugged and turned around, walking towards the apparatus floor. _Just go back and talk to him._ I shook my head. _No, don't do that._ I started arguing with myself. _Kelly Severide, go back there and talk to him._ I sighed and sat down at the squad table, making my decision. "Hey, Kelly," Dawson came up to me, "can I uh.. talk to you for a second?"

I nodded. "Sure, what's up?"

"Well," She was about to sit down, then stopped herself, "squad table. Riiight."

I laughed. "You can sit down, Gabby. You're not apart of truck...yet."

She gave a half hearted smile and sat down, then looked at me for a couple of seconds. "How are you doing?"

I sighed. "Dawson-"

"Wait, wait, I'm not here to give you advice or condescend you. I just want to know. How are you, really?"

I shrugged. "I'm doing fine."

"Really? Because the 17 empty tequila bottles say otherwise."

"You," I paused for a moment, "you were in my car?"

She scoffed. "Please. They're just strewn across the backseat. Not that hard to miss."

"I like to drink, so what."

She sighed and cast her eyes down the floor.

"Look, Gabby," I sat up, "the day I come into work drunk, you can tell chief and have him fire my ass, alright?"

She got up. "Okay." She started to walk away, then stopped, and turned around, "see you at the apartment tonight." 

I shrugged, and watched her walk away, then saw Casey coming out. I awkwardly got up and turned around to walk towards the hangar, mainly to hide. I prayed that he didn't see me. "Severide," _Damn._ I stopped and sighed, pinching the bridg of my nose with two fingers. _Not now, Case. Please just go away._ "Can I talk to you for a couple of minutes?" _No._ I bit my tongue, and shifted so I was facing him.

"Sure. What's up?"

He had his hands behind his back. "Close your eyes." My curiosity peaked. I closed my eyes and felt him grabbing my hand. "Now, place your palm facing the ceiling." I did as instructed, and he placed something into my hands, when I opened them, I saw that it was a plane ticket. Casey was smiling like a little boy on Christmas eve. "I booked us a room at the Marriot up in New York City. It's for the weekend, and we leave on Friday, I cleared it with Chief Boden and everything." He was still grinning like an idiot, patiently awaiting my response. _Don't just stand there, you idiot. Say something!_ My subconscious was nagging at me.

"Casey, I," Pausing, I looked at his face, and saw how happy he was, "that sounds great." I forced a half smile and his face lit up even brighter than before. "Look, I've got to go check on Capp's mask, he said it was acting up. I'll catch you later?" I handed the ticket back to him and turned around, walking towards the hangar. Once inside, I huffed, an sat down on the floor. _Why would I even agree to going? I don't want to go to New York City._ I put my head into my hands and sighed heavily. _You agreed to going because you didn't want to upset him._ Well, my subconscious wasn't exactly wrong. I didn't want to upset Matt, and I couldn't stand to be the person to wipe that adorable, dorky grin off of his face. _New York, here I come._

~******~

 

"Hey, hop in." Matt pulled up at exactly 6;27 a.m in his white 2015 Chevy Silverado.

"Nice digs." I examined the brand new truck before throwing my bag into the back and jumping into the passenger seat. "Let me just remind you that normally on a day off, I'm not up until 11, so if I'm grumpy, it's your fault for booking us a flight so damn early." I grabbed hold of my seat belt and pulled it over to the buckle, clicking it into place.

Matt chuckled. "This was all they had available on such short notice. Besides, it isn't that bad." He looked over to me, and smiled. "Let's listen to some music." He turned on the radio, and his phone synced. "I'm thinking," He scrolled through his music selection on his IPhone, "You me at six, John Meyer, or Luke Bryan." He looked over to me again. "Which one?"

I shrugged. "Depends on the album of each artist."

He grinned. "Well, we've got Hold me down, by You me at six, then we've got Kill the Lights, by Luke Bryan, and lastly; Continuum by John Meyer."

"Hmm," I thought for a second, "Kill the Lights." Casey smiled and pressed play, the song 'Kick the Dust Up' came on, and he set his phone down, then started up the engine, driving towards the airport.  
When we got there, Gabby was waiting. "Hey guys." She smiled at the both of us.

"Hey," Matt jumped out of the driver's seat, and I followed suit, "could you grab the bags?" He looked over to me.

"Sure." I opened the tailgate on the truck and grabbed Matt's bag, then mine.

"I'll come pick you guys when you get back." She reached for the truck keys, but Matt promptly pulled them away. Gabby started pouting. "Don't be like that." When pouting didn't work, she playfully started poking him in his ribs, chest, and abdomen. I couldn't really tell if she was flirting, but I felt a tinge of jealous spark up inside of me. I wanted to say, 'Mine', but knew that I couldn't, because Casey wasn't actually mine, _not yet._

"Just don't scratch the truck, I paid $50,000 for her, and I don't want to come home and have to do repairs." He cautiously handed her the keys, ad walked over to me. I smiled inwardly, knowing Casey didn't flirt with Dawson like she had with him.

"Oh, Serveride," She grabbed a box out of her purse and lightly threw it to me, "don't forget these." Once I saw what they were, my cheeks heated up, and I quickly shoved the box into my duffel bag. _Guess she wasn't flirting._

"What did she throw at you?" Matt bumped my shoulder with his.

I shrugged. "Nothing important."  
When we arrived at the hotel, Matt placed his bag on the one bed that was in the room he reserved. "There's only one bed..?"

"Hmm," He frowned, "I guess I booked a one bed instead of two." He shrugged it off, then walked into the bathroom.

I had a sneaking suspicion that he in fact had done that on purpose, but I played along. "Alright, that's okay." I set my bag on the couch that was in the room, grabbing my phone from the back of my pocket and turning it on, smiling when I saw my lock screen. Casey and I.   
Three hours later, Matt and I had roamed the city, bought a couple of souvenirs, and went to dinner. I flopped down onto the bed when we reached the room again.

I felt Casey watching me as I threw myself onto the bed, I saw him walk over to the couch and sit down. He stared down at his fingers for several minutes, as if he was having a conversation with himself. And he seemed to be at odds. It was about 7 minute later when he pushed himself up and made his way over to the bed.

"Kelly," He murmured, looking into my eyes. "I've been meaning to tell you something for quite a while"

"What is it, Case?" I shifted so I was laying on my back, with my hands behind my head.

He sighed and looked down to his hands, visibly shaking, "It's uh.. It's why I brought you here,"  He glanced towards me for a couple of seconds, then averted his eyes back to the ground.

I sat up. "What's wrong? Is everything alright?" I felt a flicker of worry wash over me for a couple of seconds.

"Yes, it's nothing bad, actually." He was silent for a few momnts. "I, uhm.." He nibbled at his lip for a couple of seconds, then took in a couple of deep breaths and looked me in the eyes. "I love you, Kelly Severide." I went from worried, to.. shocked, maybe. Or maybe joyful...I couldn't pin-point the emotion I was feeling. Casey's face went pale."Oh, no..." He put his head into his hands. "I just ruined everything, didn't I?" I grabbed onto his hands, pulling him on top of me , then flipping us over so I was on top. I could see the shocked expression Casey wore.

I looked down at him for a minute or two, finally pushing the words out. "I love you, Matthew Casey." I leaned in and kissed him, softly, at first. The kiss intensified. I licked at his lips giving a silent gesture that I wanted him to open his mouth. He obviously understood, because he parted his lips and I felt his tongue entangle with mine. He lightly moaned into my mouth. I smiled and pulled away, getting off of him, I walked over and sat on the couch, motioning Matt to follow. He got up, walking over, stopping in front of me. "Strip for me." He smiled and took off his shirt, but I stopped him. "Slowly." He gave a devlish grin and slowly started undoing his jeans, letting them slide down to his ankles, he stepped out of them and was left in nothing but his boxers. I bit my lip and pulled him on top of me, his knees on either side of me. He pulled me in and started kissing me, letting both his hands rest on my chest. He was needy. Wanting. I could tell. I felt him grinding on me, and I moaned into his mouth, feeling his bulge against me. "Ah, fuck." He smiled against my lips and continued to grind. I stopped him. "If you continue doing that, I'll cum right here in my jeans." Casey laughed and got up, making his way over to the bed. He lay down on his back and put his hands behind his head, mimicking the position I was in about 15 minutes ago. I got on top of him and he pulled my shirt of my head, tossing it onto the floor, then he reached for my pants, and un-did them. I slid them off and let them falter to the ground, then I took off Matt's boxers, leaving him completely naked and vulnerable beneath me. "I love the view to be honest." I bit my lip as I examined him. His body was everything I had imagined. Perfect.

He pulled at my boxers, then took them off. "This view is honestly much, much, better." He licked his lips, looking me up and down. "I want you." He pulled me down so I was just centimeters from his lips. "I want you inside of me." Just hearing the need in his voice made me feel hot. "I've wanted this for a long time, Kelly." He bit, and licked at my bottom lip.

I got up and walked over to my bag, grabbing the box Gabby had given to me. "We're gonna need these." I shook the box. "Guess Gabby wanted it to happen just as much as we did." I pulled out the lube and condoms that was inside of the box, then crawled back on top of Matt. "Let me go all girly for a couple of seconds," I paused for a moment just to examine him again, "are you sure you want to do this?" He pulled me back down and kissed me, allowed his tongue to explore my mouth. When he pulled away, I was breathing heavily. "Well okay then." I set the condom on the bedside desk, and popped open the cap to the lube. I squeezed some onto my fingers, then placed them on Matt's chest, slowly trailing down to his member. I stroked for a couple of minutes, then continued to make my way to his opening, when I did, I put more lube down there and gently massaged the area before softly inserting one finger. I stopped, and looked over to him. "You okay?" He nodded and murmured an, 'mhm'. I slowly started moving my finger in and out, and when I felt he was loose enough, I inserted a second finger. His gripped onto my shoulders, and I stopped again. "Are you okay?"

"Yes, k-keep going, please." He let his head fall back onto the pillow.

I gladly obliged and continued to work my fingers in and out, I added a third when I felt the time was right. His grip on my shoulders tightened, and I stopped immediately, worrying that I had hurt him. "Are you okay, Matt?"

He whispered, "fuck," Then looked up to me. "If you ask me if I'm okay one more time, it won't be okay."

I lightly chuckled and continue to move my fingers inside of him. When I felt he was ready, I pulled my fingers out, earning a tiny whimper. I half-smiled and reached for the condom, ripping open the aluminum and pulling the condom out, rolling it onto myself. "You ready?" I looked down at Matt, and he was clearly nervous.

"Yes."

I placed my hands on either side of him to steady myself. I slowly entered him, being very cautious. He let out soft moans here and there. When I was all the way inside of him, I pulled back out, and inserted myself again, I did that a couple more times to ensure that he was loose enough. I began to establish a slow rhythm, rocking my hips back and forth, earning moans from Matt. I started moving a little bit quicker, placing my hands on his hips. I could already see the tell-tale bruises that would be left there.

"Fuck," Matt let out a spew of curse words, begging me for more. I loved this. I loved to see him beg.

"Do you want me to touch you?" I continued to thrust myself inside him.

"P-please." He bit his lip and gripped onto my shoulders.

I smirked and reached between us, grabbing his member. I matched the strokes with my thrusting, and I could tell I Matt teetering on the edge. I began to thrust harder, and faster. "Fuck, Matt," I moaned out loudly as I came, and Matt followed suit.

"Ah," he curled his toes as he came all over my abdomen.

I limply fell on top of him. "That," I tried to catch my breath, "was amazing." I slowly pulled out, taking the condom off, and tying it, then throwing it into the trash can that was beside the bed, I wiped off Matt's cum with a washcloth, and threw that into the trash as well. As soon as I was done with all of that, I fell into bed next to Matt.

"Agreed." He snuggled up to me, wrapping his arms around my mid section and entangling his legs with mine. "Hmmm." His head was resting on my chest. "We should definitely do things like this more often." I felt him smile.

"I can't really argue there," I pulled him closer to me, covering us up with the blanket, "now I don't know about you, but I'm exhausted." I turned off the lamp that was emanating light and closed my eyes, smiling, because I had Matt right there next to me. And in this very moment, I was the happiest person on earth.


End file.
